Archive | April 2013

Wrong Night Part II

So I had my second Mr Wrong night held in my South London apartment on 30th March. I have to say how honoured and proud I felt to be around such beautiful and inspirational women.

“What does a Mr Wrong Night entail?” I hear you ask. “Does it involve a piñata with face of ex-boyfriends and all the trifling, raggedy men who’ve messed us about and played with our lives ready and waiting to be blown to smithereens with a wooden spoon?”

Most certainly NOT.

Mr Wrong is NOT I repeat NOT about dissing men or passing blame, it’s simply an open forum in which women can discuss their dating disasters and relationship mishaps in a non-judgemental space. Mr Wrong nights are about feeling empowered and listened to and most importantly having lots of fun!!

The night kicked off with a Dating Disaster Story game. Each person had to write a memorable dating disaster story, whether it be going on a date with a man still obsessed with his ex or dating a man who pays for a three course meal then kindly asks for his “date” to pay half her share after she does not want to indulge in a passionate session of slap and tickle! As many of the guests did not know each other the stories were put into a pot (not a cauldron!) and read by a person in the circle. The person who chooses and reads the story has to guess whose story it is. There is no place for taking offence or taking ourselves too seriously when it comes to this game and it’s important to keep the wine flowing!!

The second half of the night involved me reading and sharing excerpts of the book as a discussion point. Many of the Mr Wrong types in The Many Shades of Mr Wrong and DING DONG ITS MR WRONG SKETCHES were read out as a starting point. May I say we were up until six in the morning discussing Mr Serial Liar, Mr Dreamer and Mr Vampire and Mr First Love! We hadn’t even got to Mr Ex Factor, Mr Workaholic or Mr Skater! What I, and others, found so incredibly powerful was that through the sharing of our stories we began to feel lighter, we began to feel empowered as we empathised and recognised ourselves in the stories and experiences of others. Women of all backgrounds, ages, races and religions came together to discuss a universal theme: relationships. Through sharing our experiences of relationships we were able to assess and look at the relationships that we had with ourselves; what had bought us to this point. Some of us were able to look at our relationship patterns and choose another way, some of us realised that we were so much more than our experiences and that we are not defined by the way others treat us and some of us realised that dating men who are unavailable are just that. Unavailable. Overall I think we all learnt that the most important Love is the Love that we give to ourselves.

What I loved most about Mr Wrong Part II was that it served as a stark reminder that as women we are so busy working, playing wife, playing sister, playing mother, playing homemaker, switching between roles to please everybody else we often forget what’s important. Ourselves. This night gave us the opportunity to share our stories with others: to give and take advice. The night gave us the opportunity to strip away our roles and strip down to our cores. Reflect on who WE are. Who are we and what do we want? How will I stop attracting negative relationships and people who constantly take and drain and chip away at us and set off onto a positive path to not even “Mr Right” but ultimately a man who is “right-for-us?” Someone who is able to: listen to, respect and strive to meet our needs, wants and desires.

WARNING: This night must at all times involve: plenty of food, plenty of drink and plenty of laughter. Laughter is key!

Thank you to everyone who attended. Below are your testimonials.

NB Men please don’t feel excluded: Part III Will be Mr Wrong Part III a Man’s Perspective. ALL welcome!

Food Ladies at Table Group piccie Latanya, Angela, Leesha Group piccie 2 Mavreen and Anj Group photo Group 3 Mel, Angela, Lee-Leesha T Lyrical and Tash Me n Chsienga Anj Mav Tash