Tag Archive | dating

Mr Wrong Book Review

Honoured to receive this beautifully written book review on Mr Wrong written by my co-host Sister ShamiYah with whom co-present with on The PX Book Review Show!

Thank you Sister ShamiYah!

Title- ‘Mr Wrong: Learn From Mr Wrong and Claim Mr Right.’
Author: Daniella Blechner
Publisher: Conscious Dreams Publishing

A silhouetted couple in animated posture graced the cover of this telling testimonial and liberating handbook on one of the most powerful affairs of the heart; the power of Love.

As front cover designs go, there is nothing obscure about the message of the book. Set against a white background, the couple are complemented in red and white attire almost themed to a Valentine romance novel. You can buy this book with your eyes before spending a quid. Your eyes are immediately drawn to the body language of the couple. The woman in a little red number, stiletto heels to match leans pouting to the man with three heart bubbles rising from her. Mr debonair’ s body- language evasive, hides a heart wrapped in barbed wire hidden behind his back.
Mr Wrong, the title is red, almost rising from the cover with the O in wrong a barbed wired heart.

Combining vividly themed colours of red, Black and white, the illustrator grabs the attention of reader who may perceive a romantic novel. Once however, the cover is peeled back; the author’s unstinting personality and skilfully writing profile is what grabs the attention.

dannilouiseTransparent3I am not a novel’s person, so this book was written for me. I am not a Valentine’s person so the cover of itself could have competed for my attention on the shelf. While the message of the book is simple…learn from ‘Mr wrong and Claim Mr Right’ the journey through the book is not that simple. Drawing from the experiences of women around the globe Daniella weaves searching testimonial into the fabric of a structured easy-to-follow text. She uses heading and sub-headings to easily sign post the reader to the contents. This is visually enriched by sketches of characters enhancing the message given succinctly.

The confrontational messages hold up a mirror to the reader as the testimonies are encounters we may have had or are having. Your judgement is suspended as the experiences and mistakes are your or those of your family and friends. Not only if you are tempted to laugh you may be laughing at yourself; but Danni’s sharp wit and sense-of –humour personality will pull your funny-bone anyway.

Consider this book your friend who tells you the truth……..even a mirror! The author’s own honesty and transparency about her journey will open up the reader to come to terms with message ringing in your ear…….” It’s not him, it’s you!” In the absence of self-knowledge and self-LOVE, you draw into your intimate space who you are subconsciously and where you are emotionally and even spiritually.

Using identification terms like, ‘Mr X Factor’, ‘Mr Loose Eye’ and ‘Mr Surfer’ tells how to spot each one. Some of her titles did make me chuckle. I was looking for ‘Mr Village Ram!’ to complete the line-up. Alas, my Caribbean taste for those characters was not to be satiated.
Replete with activities, exercises, and quizzes, Daniella has not only empowered the reader but wrote a book that can be easily read on a holiday break, in between bus stops, lunch breaks and in the psychiatrist chair…to him or her! For with this handbook the psychiatrist or psychologist should no longer be needed.

Liberating! Empowering! Transformational!

Reviewed by Yishebah Baht Gavriel 26/01/15 for PowerXtra Radio Review.


Dating Suggestions from Angel the Competition Winner!

Here are some suggestions for interesting dates

Back in the day one of the most popular places for couples to meet was at the dance hall or disco.So how about:

a) Joining salsa,ceroc, jive,swing dance classes.Not only do you learn a new skill and enjoy great music, you can get a great workout and get fit.Also,most guys really enjoy taking the lead and twirling you around the dancefloor.
Hopefully you won’t be partnered with the hapless one taking you to the right when everyone else is going left!

b)If you’re based in London, Late Nights at the V&A (Fridays). Fantastic atmosphere relaxing outside on a balmy summer evening with a glass of wine or enjoy a delicious meal
inside ……and hey,you might even have time to wander around the exhibits accompanied by music from the main hall.

c) Hang out at South bank where you can take a boat trip down the Thames. There’s also the buzz and atmosphere of food stalls,free foyer events or concerts at Royal Festival Hall.

d) If you have an interest in theatre,many offer guided backstage
tours…..a fascinating insight into the nooks and crannies behind the curtains.
For the really adventurous who don’t mind getting hot sweaty and dishevelled,there’s always bungee jumping, kayaking, rockclimbing etc where you might meet a hunky adrenaline junkie.Me, I prefer to stay dry, groomed and preferably on dry land….c’est la vie!

Good Luck,


Extraordinary Woman- Silvia Hartmann

Silvia Hartmann

German born researcher, systems designer and author Silvia Hartmann is the creator of The Harmony Program, Project Sanctuary, EMO Energy In Motion, The Genius Symbols and the originator of  The SUE Scale, The Aspects Model and Events Psychology.

A world renown expert on human genius and creativity, and with a lifelong mission to heal the divide between love and logic, Silvia Hartmann has created an unprecedented and entirely original body of work.

Bringing reason, sanity and logic to modern energism, Silvia Hartmann is the chair person and trainings director of The AMT, The Guild of Energists. Her techniques, models, systems are used by millions and her acclaimed training programs are conducted around the world.

Silvia Hartmann’s work with modern energism, which is not based on ancient teachings or religious beliefs, but instead acknowledges directly the truth and reality of human existence, is unprecedented, ground breaking and (r)evolutionary – but most of all, it works.

“Love without logic is insanity. And vice versa.”- Silvia Hartmann

You are an EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) Practitioner can you explain what this means and how people can benefit?

I was an EFT practitioner from 1998 to 2002, and in that time, I worked with thousands of people – in the street, at exhibitions, on radio and TV shows, in seminars and trainings, all the time. I was fascinated by the responses of people, and I wanted to know exactly how EFT works.

This led me to create EMO – Energy in Motion – in 2002. EMO is a pure energy healing modality that works with the sensations of emotions and psychosomatic pain, and this gave us the missing answers.

EFT works by acting on the energy system, and it is directed by focusing the conscious mind on areas of problems.

The work with EMO also led us to discovering the effects of energy body stress, the SUE Scale, how the Healing Events in EFT work, how events influence the energy body and create beliefs, values and attitudes there, and many other things besides.

In 2011, I re-wrote the official practitioner trainings on EFT for The AMT to incorporate the new findings and now, Energy EFT is unrivalled as a method to help people change, not just fast, but also reliably and logically.

It’s an amazing thing to consider that in all the time that went before, the ancient systems never dealt with emotions at all, and emotions are the most important thing in the lives of humans. They create everything, from art to war, and create human experience from the cradle to the grave.

We finally have a working definition of what emotions actually are – they are feedback from the energy body to let you know how it’s doing.

We finally have a variety of techniques to “control emotions” – for the first time in the history of humanity. As an aside, I do believe that is so because the primary researchers were female, and as such, they knew of the importance of emotions and to find out what’s going on, rather than just trying to make them go away!

EFT, and especially Positive EFT, is an excellent first step into solving the problems in your own life, and taking control of emotions. Particularly Positive EFT is wonderfully effective, uplifting, so simple to use that a 3 year old child can learn it, and simply a brilliant introduction to modern energy work.

What is the difference between EFT and EMO?

In EFT, we follow a simple protocol that works by tapping on major meridian points. EMO works by asking a person where they feel a problem in their body, for example, if someone is very stressed, they might feel this primarily in their stomach churning. In EMO, we don’t have to talk about it or ask who, why or what; we simply direct the healing at that exact place where it hurts, where the disturbance is located, and restore the energy flow there directly.

You could say that EFT is the bridge between old fashioned counselling and psychotherapy style talking about the problem, and EMO, which is pure energy body healing without the talk.

Not having to talk about the problem can have significant advantages for certain types of problems, for example rape victims and child abuse survivors, but also victims of post-traumatic stress and children are often far more comfortable with the direct healing of what hurts right now.


Mr Wrong examines belief systems, in your view where do they come from and how can EFT help eliminate or reduce limiting belief systems or negative core beliefs?

Beliefs come into being as the result of an event that causes a change in the energy body.

For example, a person might be perfectly happy relating to men, and then a single event happens that acts like a lightning strike in the energy system, and causes a major injury in a particular location.

When you ask people about these events, they always know exactly when it happened, when this lightning strike of high emotion went through their body, and the world was never the same again.

Beliefs are the conscious comments; we call them meta-comments, after the fact.

So, for example, someone might have found out that their partner cheated on them. That moment of revelation is a full body experience, that lightning strike, and it changes all the beliefs in heartbeat.

The person goes from, “Men are great fun and I love them!” to “Men are monsters!” in a heartbeat.

It’s the result of that lightning strike, which caused an injury in the energy system. When you finally heal that injury, the beliefs change. The meta-comments change. They don’t change back to how they were, but “men are monsters” won’t be there. The person might come away with “Men are human beings …” and that is far more reality based.

This happens reliably and time and time again, with all sorts of people from all walks of life, all religions, all educational levels. It’s structural and that’s why I know we are right about these injuries in the energy body that can’t be healed by talking – they need ENERGY HEALING to put them right.

So to sum this up – beliefs are created by events in the energy system. When you heal the energy system of its injuries, beliefs change as a direct result of this healing. Which is really awesome, when you think about it!

Is it important to know what our limited beliefs are or return to the “point of trauma” or is EFT simply about releasing?

You can do both, and that’s a really neat thing about modern energy work. We use a system called “The Aspects Model” whereby we say that you, here and now, are not the same person that you were when you were three years old. It thereby makes no sense at all to say, “I have just wet my pants.” That’s not you, that was the three year old aspect, and we need to learn to think that way, and talk that way.

So we say, “The three year old aspect wet her pants.” Now we can send her love and healing across time and space, and when we do, it feels wonderful. We can treat all manner of aspects who are in need of rescue still, in need of love, healing and support, and that’s a wonderful thing.

But we also have the option to simply work with how YOU feel, right here and now, and change that instead.

So if you have a fear of public speaking because of that incident with the three year old who wet her pants at show and tell in kindergarten, and you’re standing at the stage entrance, and you’re about to go on to speak, and you are feeling nauseous here and now, we can simply treat that and it will work just as well.

With EFT and all modern energy work, we have a wonderful rainbow of techniques so that people can choose what they want to do, what feels most right and best to each individual person.

To me, that’s super important; I’m a child abuse survivor and to go with what I need, rather than what dogma dictates I should be feeling or doing, was and still is of utmost importance in all my work.

When we pay attention to how we are feeling, and react accordingly, we experience personal healing that is right, no matter who we are on our respective journeys.

What is the difference between EFT and Positive EFT?

There are essentially two versions of EFT – Classic EFT, the old version that is still used by many who learned EFT back in the day, and Energy EFT.

Classic EFT, even though it consists of tapping on MERIDIAN points, came from a psychotherapy background and didn’t really understand that we were working with the energy body.

Indeed, in Classic EFT the question how it works is never answered; it’s just said that you can tap your negative emotions away and that’s that.

Energy EFT on the other hand, works with the energy body and I learned that the cure for negative emotions is actually positive emotions – strong, powerful positive energies which heal and nourish the energy body.

In Classic EFT, a scale to measure emotions was used, called the SUE scale which went from -10 (totally freaked out) to 0 – no emotions at all.

This was inherited from the medical pain measurement scale. When there’s no pain, the treatment stops and you’re done.

What we learned was that when you are dealing with emotions, having no emotions at all, zero emotions, is not the answer at all!

You need to go up into the positive ranges, when people start to come to life and experience POSITIVE emotions, in order to say that an emotional problem has been healed.

Classic EFT stopped too soon and sent people home before the treatment was actually finished – at that zero point of nothing.

Even so, going from major emotional pain to nothing was a revelation at that time; nobody had ever experienced anything like it.

In Energy EFT, we work with the SUE Scale instead, which goes from -10 via 0 to +10.

That is far more effective and it makes the treatments complete.

But most people do not need psychotherapy at all, where you start with major trauma and slowly work your way up the SUE scale.

For everyday life, and our own various challenges, all we need is really, just some more energy so we feel happier, stronger, and life becomes easier.

So I designed Positive EFT for everyday use, as an introduction to how EFT works, as a simple self-help technique that doesn’t require you to psycho-analyse yourself at all, for use with children and normal, everyday people to have a powerful antidote to emotional stress.

Positive EFT is also useful to introduce people to the positive wing of the SUE scale, and the basic principle that when you feed your energy body with positive energy, it becomes stronger – and you become happier in mind, body and spirit.

You have a new book, Love EFT: Tapping Positive EFT for Dating, Romance, Love and Relationships, out which is incredibly exciting, how can women, and men, benefit from the practises within the book?

LOVE-EFT-by-Silvia-HartmannThere are two worlds – one is the world without factoring in energy, like our own energy bodies and the energy exchanges that happen between people in a couple bubble, or a group bubble. Here, nothing makes sense and everything seems difficult, incomprehensible and out of control.

And then, there is the other world. Here, energy is real, and we factor in what happens energetically between people. Now, all of a sudden, everything makes sense.

Why people who are low on energy get stressed, and start to behave badly. Why we can be saints one minute, and sinners the next. It all depends on the levels of energy in your energy body, and we never knew this.

There are so many things that make perfect sense when you factor in the energy levels.

How a person can literally die of a broken heart – yes, people really have a heart of energy, and it really does get injured, and when it does, the entire energy system is affected and doesn’t work properly any longer.

I saw a lady the other day who was stiff, cold and as frozen. She had been like that since her husband left her, and her heart (of energy!) was broken. She had all sorts of therapy but the simple idea of healing that broken heart had never been addressed, not once, in 15 years!

In Energy EFT, we start and end the rounds with the Heart Healing position. This lady did a little EFT and I told her about her own healing hands and how to put them on her heart of energy with a healing intention, and not five minutes later, she started to melt a little. Colour came back into her face, she could breathe more deeply and her stiff body started to unlock.

Love is all about energy! It is ONLY about energy, so how on Earth could we ever start to heal love problems, or evolve as lovers (!!!), without understanding energy?

It’s a mystery to me …

Seriously though, love problems are energy problems, and we have awesome techniques to finally start healing the energy body and evolving it, helping it grow strong and shiny.

Oh – and that of course, is the X-Factor! Your energy body! That which people can’t see but they can sense it and it’s super-attractive.

I await the day when folk spend as much time and attention on getting a shiny, love-attracting energy body as they do on their teeth, their clothes, their weight loss obsessions and plastic surgery!!!!

Can these be practised at home?

Absolutely! That’s what all the modern energy techniques are for primarily – for one person at a time to learn about their energy system, how it affects their emotions, and to take charge of the whole thing.

And let’s remember – the point of “controlling your emotions” is not to feel nothing, to end up at zero. That’s not life. Feeling amazing, feeling good, and being the person you were designed to be, shining brightly, that’s what modern energy work is all about.

I recommend Positive EFT because you simply can’t go wrong with it. All positive energy is good for the energy body, and a round of Positive EFT gives you a better energy boost than drinking coffee or downing a can of RedBull!

And if you are particularly interested in the power of love, understand the importance of that, feel it in your heart that only love can heal all love problems, then “Love EFT” is for you.

What do you enjoy most about the valuable work you do?

Helping people out of confusion and helping them make sense of their lives. That moment when a person sees the energy body stress chart for the first time, and they realise that they’re not insane, not genetically or karmically doomed, but that they’ve just been under tremendous stress for such a long time – it’s a major triumph, a major victory, each and every time that happens.

To bring logic and love together, to help people discover the logic of love and the reality of energy which makes the world into a truly magical place, that’s my mission and my delight.

When I was young, the world of people made absolutely no sense to me, and for the longest time I thought there had to be something majorly wrong with me.

Now, I know that everybody thinks that – but we were all wrong. There’s nothing wrong with us – apart from having grown up and tried to live with half of reality missing!

Emotions are super important. They are a part of our 6th sense that all humans are born with, but particularly men are trained to ignore – the body sensations that have no physical origin, the body sensations that tell us about the functioning of our own energy system, and that of others.

It may be that the teachers of the world were exclusively male for the past ten thousand years that there has been no significant research into emotions at all, but I am female and I know my emotions. I’ve made it my business to understand them, I’ve spent my entire life doing that, and after 45 years, I am delighted that I have found answers that are practical and make a difference in people’s lives.

I am proud to be an energist – someone who knows that energy is absolutely real, and wants to find out more what energy can do for us individually, for our relationships, for our loved ones, and in the end, for all of humanity.

Where can we buy a copy of your book?

Love EFT is available from all good bookshops, online and off, from February 14th, 2015 and publisher direct as ebook or hardcopy via http://www.DragonRising.com

What next for Silvia Hartmann?

I am an explorer by nature and my first love is research. There is so much we are yet to learn about especially the energy of relationships!

Old energy methods focused on drawing maps of an idealised individual, like the perfect (male!) vegetarian monk from 10,000 years ago.

Modern energy work is about learning how an individual works, but very importantly, about the energetic relationships that exists between all the aspects of a single person, a person and their partner, their families, their social groups.

For the past couple of years, I’ve been working with the structure of groups, and how learning, teaching and teamwork transforms when you take energy into consideration.

This is an ongoing exploration; and then of course, there is my personal favourite, which is the energy mind – previously known as the subconscious or unconscious mind. We now simply say that it is the head of the energy body, and when you improve the flow of energy between the energy mind and the conscious mind, visionary genius becomes a practical reality.

My mission is and has always been to make sense of what it means to be a human being – and true creativity, genius by any other name, is a part of that. It’s a part of our birth right.

Humans have so much untapped potential, and people just didn’t understand how to get there. How to get past their emotional blockages. How to get past their past! By focusing on the energy body, we literally open up unimaginable potential for personal development, further scientific investigation – and having fun, for that is a positive emotional state! – along the way.

Energy is real.

You can feel it’s real.

Now let’s do something amazing with it! 🙂


For more info on the Superwoman that is Silvia Hartmann visit:

Website: SilviaHartmann.com

Join The AMT: www.TheAMT.com

Facebook: facebook.com/theofficialsilviapage

Twitter: twitter.com/starfields/

Best Books on Love, Relationships and Dating

I’ve been reading some pretty amazing books recently and if you’re like me and have been struggling with relationships or if you simply love to read up on the subject of Love, Relationships and Dating then please  check out my recommended reading list.

I am also looking for bloggers to review some of these books so please inbox me to register your interest at dingdongitsmrwrong@yahoo.co.uk if you would like to see your reviews in print and online!


7 Shades of Love Poetry needs YOUR poems

7 chakrasI NEED YOU!

I am compiling an anthology called 7 Shades of Love. 7 Shades of Love is based on the 7 colours of the rainbow and their inferred meanings.

If you have a poem about love, relationships and dating please submit your poem here!

Poems can be of any length, format or style. Below are the colours broken down into themes.

Red: Passion, fire, security, a sense of belonging, safety

Orange: creativity, passion, addictive relationships/love eroticism

Yellow: Losing power within a relationship, finding our power, abusive relationships, hope

Green: Self Love, heartbreak, losing Love, finding Love, Loving ourselves, new love

Blue: Feeling blue, finding our voice, expressing our Love

Indigo: Opening our eyes, finding out who we are in a relationship, self realisation, fantasy love

Violet: True Love, Unconditional Love, realisation, Love encompasses all

If you wish to apply please upload your poem here at dingdongitsmrwrong@yahoo.co.uk and you will receive a reply upon receipt. All poets chosen for submission will be notified by 7th February and asked for further details.

I can’t wait to read your entries!

Good luck!


Chapter 12- Start With You


Please find another excerpt taken from Chapter 2 called Start With You. I hope you enjoy and that some of this may ring true.

Chapter 12:  Start with You

These are self-esteem battering and, at worst, abusive relationships and unless you want to keep experiencing the same death march each time, I strongly advise you take a deep breath, embrace a new approach and follow these steps to Mr Right. But first it starts with you and the way you perceive yourself; how you feel about yourself. If you are ready to be honest with yourself and do some soul-searching (it doesn’t have to be a long and arduous task) and embrace a new approach you are halfway there!

I have asked myself time and time again, ‘Why have I deserved this treatment again?’ and even wondered why the world was punishing me. Why were most of my friends settled down and living happy healthy relationships and lives and here am I trawling through painful relationship after painful relationship getting it wrong time and time again. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t they see what a catch I was? I’m intelligent, loving, caring, independent, vivacious and positive. It took me over a decade to dissect the questions I was asking only to realise that I was asking the wrong questions. The question was not, “What was wrong with me?” but “Why am I attracting the wrong man for me?” The question was not, “Why can’t they see what a catch I am?” but “Why couldn’t I see what a good catch I was?” What was wrong with me was that I had allowed my sense of self-worth and self-esteem to be dictated and defined by the way these men had treated me. I had somehow subconsciously agreed that I had deserved it and in doing so kept on attracting the same type of man into my experience.

Now I imagine you’re reading this now protesting, “No I have a high sense of self-esteem and self-worth!” I did. Well if that is the case why do we keep attracting and staying with the same kind of unavailable men who hold us in such unsatisfying and negative situations? The answer is; it is us. It is we who are holding ourselves in this unhappy and unhealthy situation, we who have chosen this path and we who have chosen this man.  What we need to ask ourselves is, “Why have we chosen this particular man and path?” and “What are our expectations?” Do we deep down, expect these men to walk away from us, to hurt us and abandon us or do we expect this man to offer us an equal loving and stable relationship based on honesty and mutual respect? If we are expecting the latter and getting the opposite and stay what does this say about our sense of self-worth; our sense of self-esteem? Equally if we are expecting the worst and receive the worst and stay put the same question can be posed, what does this say about our sense of self-worth; our sense of self-esteem?

Belief Systems

Belief systems are deeply ingrained beliefs we have about ourselves and the world around us. These are created and formed at an early age and affected by experiences and events we experience. Our belief systems can be affected by the way we are treated by others or made to feel. They can also be affected by other peoples’ opinions or perceptions. For example, if a child is told by people in “authority” or “authoritative positions” over and over again that they are clumsy, thick and will never get anywhere it is most likely the child not only hear these words, they will ‘feel’ these words and associate these words with themselves. Every time they hear them they begin to believe these words apply to them. They will live out these words and most likely fulfill these false prophecies formed by someone else’s misguided opinion.  If they are told they are “unlovable” as a child and they experience a lack of love from those who are meant to love them, most likely they will find it harder to accept and believe they deserve to be loved just for being who they are. Perhaps they will try and change who they really are in order to fit in or conform hence deep in their deep belief system they believe that in order to be loved they must conform; they must not be themselves. How long can a person live this way, concealing who they really are? How can a person really truly love themselves if they cannot be themselves? Truly. How healthy is it to live your life believing that to be loved you need to live by someone else’s standards? Everyone deserves to be loved. No one is any more or less worthy. However, when we live through these kinds of experiences without being fully aware of the affects upon our own thinking or sense of self we become littered with false and dangerous belief systems that have been dictated to us by those who, quite often, already have negative belief systems about themselves.

If we as a child have been abandoned or neglected, we may as adults suffer from a deep seated fear of abandonment. We may fear that everyone we become close to will eventually leave and abandon us. We may end up catering so heavily to somebody else’s needs that we forget our own. This relationship is unhealthy and based on the belief system that you are not worthy enough to be loved. If you have not placed your needs, wants and desires high up on that ladder of importance why would or should anyone else? I am a big believer that whatever we thoughts we hold in our belief system we will attract. Like attracts like. That what we focus on the most will always transpire into our conscious lives. Have you ever been in a situation when you’ve feared the worst and when the worst happens you say, almost triumphantly, “I knew that was going to happen!” Well of course it did it’s what you believed to be true! In the past, the relationships I had attracted and the men I had chosen perfectly matched my deep rooted belief that I didn’t deserve to be loved and that I will eventually be bitterly let down. Well at least a perfect match! How could I possibly be a victim when I have simply attracted what I believed to be true?

Change your thinking and your thinking will change you!!

Dating Disasters. Mr Not-So-Charming-

A bill presented at Ethno restaurant, Bansko, BulgariaDating is a great way to get to know a person befor embarking on anything more serious. It allows us insight into the person’ character before we get in too deep. Many men wave that red flag from day dot. Read the dating story from one of my lovely contributors below.

Mr Not-So-Charming

Having been single for a few months, I finally decided to accept a date from a work colleague, totally disregarding the old adage about not dipping your pen into the office ink. I just thought that I might as well live a little- he was cute, had a good personality and we had been flirting so why not? He promised to take me to an exquisite restaurant with gourmet food and top notch service.
On the night of the date he picked me up in his car and even opened the door for me. He was even more witty and funny than usual and was saying all the right things and being extremely complimentary. How could this not be the beginning of a great night?

The restaurant however had no ambience, the service was flat and the food was some of the worst I had tasted. Gelatinous risotto and dry pheasant do not do it for me. Furthermore it seemed that Percy Pepper and Suzy Salt were on a vacation! That was my take however my dining companion still thought that this place was the best thing since sliced bread. To cap it all off the bill was grossly overpriced but my date put his hand in immediately and said that he had asked me out so he would pay.
He drove me home and as we parked outside of my house I thanked him for the good time and he then leaned in for a kiss. I instantly recoiled and explained that I liked him but only as a friend. He seemed to understand and didn’t seem offended…

The next week at work I came in and logged into my computer and waited for my emails to update and among the new emails I saw one from my date. I clicked on it expecting a cheery good morning laced with some witty repartee instead I got a short, sharp monosyllabic request for me to pay for half of the bill since I had told him that we wouldn’t be anything more than “friends”.

This is the reason I always insist on splitting the bill!
Ms Won’t Date a Co-Worker Again! 28, London, England

Now I don’t know about you, but I am of the volition that if a man asks you out on a date and offer to pay then he should do just that without any expectations. I think Miss Co Worker acted with real grace and dignity in this scenairo. Ladies what would you have done? Men- where do you stand on the who pays for what on the first date situation? Does paying for a woman mean instant rights to some sort of intimacy and if so why haven’t we got the memo? Do you insist on splitting the bill on first dates?