Tag Archive | self love

Extraordinary Woman- Jenice Revers

Jenice2 Jenice Revers is a lively, spirited, energetic Transformational Author, Speaker, and Coach that uses her life stories as the vehicle to inspire women globally to start their journey of self-healing, self-love and reclaim their self-worth.

Her background is in working with children and families over the past two decades.  She has served as Teacher, School Counsellor, Social Worker, and Advisor to the Family Courts in her homeland, Jamaica and in England where she resides for the past nine years.  She is also the author of Immigrant Workers to the UK: A Personal Journey to Success published in November 2013.

Jenice’s word to women in her book Damn It, I’m Worthy is ‘Life is not happening to you: Life is responding to you’.   You are not a victim of your circumstances; you are creating your own destiny with the thoughts you choose to entertain in your mind, consciously or unconsciously.

Choose to enjoy beautiful thoughts and watch your life transform!!!

www.jenicerevers.com

 

So you have a book Damn It, I’m Worthy coming out in June can you tell us what inspired you to write it?

I wrote ‘Damn It, I’m Worthy’ to help women who are where I used to be; to provide a resource to support women’s transformation so they can heal themselves from past hurts, fall madly in love with themselves and re-ignite their power and greatness or take it to the next level so as to unleash the best version of themselves.
It’s a great title. What made you come up with it?

Damn It, I’m Worthy came out of a place where I decided that ‘enough is enough’ I’m worthy and I will live my life from this truth whether situations or people externally to me agree with my value.  I later came to realise that the feeling of unworthiness was very common among women especially as we are naturally nurturers so oftentimes find ourselves in situations or relationships where we are over-giving of ourselves and our kindness is often not reciprocated.

 

Why do you think so many women stay in unhappy relationships for so long?

I believe that some women stay in unhealthy relationships beyond the expiry date due to feeling a sense of unworthiness; feeling that their worth or identity is linked to being in a relationship; for those who are mothers, sometimes think that they are staying for their children to have the benefits of growing up in a family with both parents although it is sometime evident that the relationship is causing more short-term and long-term harm to their children.

 

What advice would you give to a woman who 1) keeps on attracting Mr Wrong 2) decides to stay in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship?

I would advise women who are in unhealthy relationships or those continuing to attract ‘Mr Wrong’ to consider taking some time to themselves where they address any past hurts that are causing them to show up in relationships with men as wounded, unworthy and unlovable.  Take this time to determine what they have been tolerating in relationships; what they really want from a relationship and reflect on the things that there is to love about themselves.  I guarantee that this journey of self-discovery is empowering and will help women to have clarity as they move forward in forming new relationships or re-establishing their current relationships.  By our own example of how we treat ourselves, we teach others how to treat us so take the journey to falling madly in love with yourself and often times our partners among others will reciprocate.

I love the quote Life isn’t happening to you: Life is responding to you’ how can we adjust our thought processes or mind-sets to receive the things we want?

We can adjust our thought processes or mind-sets to receive the things we want by identifying what are the thoughts or beliefs we are currently entertaining in our minds that are sabotaging our success in our relationships and other areas of life; then we go through a process of planting and cultivating new, positive, life-giving, joyful, grateful thoughts that will significantly transform our lives.

What can women expect from a coaching session with you?

I take women on a journey through my 12 weeks coaching or home study programmes where they focus on self-love, self-discovery, creating and setting up healthy boundaries, making integrity-based decisions, forgiving and self-compassion work; discover their ‘Inner Goddess’ to re-ignite their power and greatness so as to unleash the best version of themselves. Oftentimes, we are not aware of the self-sabotaging thoughts and beliefs that we are entertaining in our minds and are preventing our success in relationships and other areas of life.  Hence, we will need a coach who will expose these thoughts and beliefs that exist in our ‘blindspot’ and support us to create a new story/vision to the life we dream of.

Onto the publishing process. You published with Lisa Nichols’ company MTM Press can you tell us a little bit more about the event and mentoring scheme?

Well, I attended Lisa Nichols’ event called Speak&Write in May 2015 and it was awesome.  I learned about the importance of being vulnerable when sharing your story with others whether through writing or speaking.  Instead of ‘telling’ we were encouraged to ‘show’ people our stories so they can connect with us and experience the joy or the pain or other emotions we felt.  If you should read my book Damn It, I’m Worthy or attend one of my workshops or conferences you will have an opportunity to experience me ‘showing’ you my story.  I am currently being mentored by Lisa Nichols’ company in a 5 months business coaching programme and it’s big investment but what’s the heck, I deserve it and it is an investment in the quality of products and services I am offering to you and other women across the world.  I am also using Lisa Nichols’ company, MTM Press to publish my book which is a different service all together, where I am guided through a process of writing and launching a ‘bestseller’.

Having met you, you are full of energy and clear in terms of your vision. Where do you see yourself in five years’ time and what would you have liked to have achieved?

In 5 years, I will be well established in hosting my Damn It, I’m Worthy international women’s conferences in the UK and abroad.  I would have completed many more book publications and speaking on many different platforms so as to take women on their own journey from being stuck in past hurts to living a life where their inner goddess is being unleashed for them to achieve their greatness.

What advice would you give to anyone who wants to publish a book?

Start now to write your story, not giving any thought to grammar, structure, and context, just get it on paper.  There are editors who can provide you with different levels of support by structuring your content to make your dream of becoming an author a reality.  This service is usually at a cost but is well worth it for your story to be shared with the world in a coherent way.  You can also explore traditional publishing opportunities where the publisher will finance the publication and promotion of your book or you can take your destiny in your own hands and do what is called ‘self-publishing’ which is a very popular option.

What’s next for Jenice Revers?

What next is that I will be on a Book Launch Tour in London, Birmingham, Nottingham promoting Damn It, I’m Worthy throughout July 2015.  I’m booked for the Film, Art, Book EXPO on 4th July @ Platanos College, Clapham Road, London SW9 0AL (Stockwell area) and 18th July @ Stephen Lawrence Centre, 39 Brookmill Road, London SE8 4HU (Deptford area) where you will get your signed copy and experience readings from my book and intimate Q&A session for a total transformation.   I’m on the New York City leg of my Book Launch Tour from 1st-18th August 2015 in Harlem, Queen, Bronx, Brooklyn and other areas.  Lastly, but not least, I will be hosting a Damn It, I’m Worthy Women’s Conference in London on 25th November 2015 (venue to be confirmed).

Thank you!

Contact Jenice: info@jenicerevers.com or jenicerevers@yahoo.com

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Know What You Deserve- Positive Thinking

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An Excerpt from Chapter 10

Know what you Deserve

We are beautiful women, who are trained to remain strong and loving in adversity, to stand by our man through thick and thin. But what if our man is not sticking by us? What if we deserve better? First we must know better. Be crystal clear about your expectations from a man and a relationship. What is it you want, need and desire? What and where are your boundaries? What will you put up with and what will you not? What’s important for you? Until we ourselves know the answers to these questions we will be keeping our path open for the wrong man as the net spreads across the ocean. Why leave yourself open to everything and everybody when we can be clear on our intentions and expectations? I don’t want any sharks lurking at the bottom of the ocean thank you!

We do not need to leave ourselves wide open and expose our vulnerabilities to men who do not treat us respectfully. Neither do we need validation or permission to be loved. We are already loved if we already love ourselves and we certainly do not need permission. Be mindful of our negative beliefs, thinking and patterns and aim to change the course of direction they are taking us. We can change them by thinking positively about ourselves and surrendering and making peace with our past experiences. Put them to bed. They have no place in your present or your future.

We may have experienced a traumatic relationship and may fear it may happen again, we may have such a low opinion of ourselves that it effects the way in which we are treated by others. Our negative thoughts and belief systems cause more negative experiences that reinforce the fear and negativity believed to start with! It is not just women who hold these belief systems within us: it’s men too. Just as we want to feel good about ourselves, believe positive things about ourselves we want to attract a man who truly feels good about himself too. An unhappy man cannot love a woman fairly or healthily until, he himself is happy. He will only serve to make an unhappy woman unhappier and a drive a positive woman into the depths of unhappiness. We must change our thinking and negative thought patterns to attract a positive man who is attracted to our positive thought processes.Now I’m not for a minute saying to stay away from men who have had traumatic experiences nor am I saying that if we as women have experienced unpleasant relationships or had traumatic experiences we can never have a successful relationship, but what I am saying loud and clear is do not let them (the experiences) dictate who you are and how you behave and more importantly how and what they make us feel or believe about ourselves.

Until we recognise, confront and aim to change these negative thought patterns and belief systems in ourselves we will always be attracting that which we most fear or think about. It begins with awareness. Awareness is the catalyst for change. Part of becoming aware is to accept and surrender to our fears. To be aware of them but do not feed them. Why feed an angry wolf when you can feed a loving one?

Give thought to that which makes us smile, laugh and sing; gives us a sense of hope and joy and belief in our dreams. Hold positive thoughts about the types of relationships we do want not the ones we most fear. Mr Right not Mr Wrong.

In saying that we need to recognise and acknowledge what we don’t want before we can claim what we do. Acknowledge our fears but don’t feed them. I came across this American parable below and regulalry try to apply to my life.

Native American Parable

An elderly Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life. He said to them, “A fight is going on inside me, it is a terrible fight and it’s between two wolves. One wolf is evil—he is fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, competition, superiority and ego.

 

The other is good—he is joy, peace, love, hope sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.

 

The same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person too.”

 

They thought about this for a minute, and then one child asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win, Grandfather?”

The elder simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Which one will you feed?